“ ‘Variation in the English Indefinite Article’ by Tim Pulju”
Reviewed by Don Mueang Changi
and
“ ‘Variation in the English Indefinite Article’ by Tim Pulju”
Reviewed by Dr. Francis Narcía
From Speculative Grammarian CLXXI.1, September 2014
Reviewed by Phineas Q. Phlogiston, Ph.D.
Unintentional University of Lghtnbrgstn
When I accepted the job of Deputy Sub-Assistant Editorial Review Editor Reviewer for this issue, I was familiar with the phrase herding cats, but I didn’t really, truly know what it meant. I’ve actually herded literal cats before—unsuccessfully, as it is an impossible task, to be sure. But it is less impossible than the impossibility of getting a bunch of lazy, good-for-nothing Review Editors to write reviews in a timely manner and/or orderly fashion.
Now I have two reasonably tolerable reviews of “Variation in the English Indefinite Article” by Tim Pulju, by Don Mueang Changi and Dr. Francis Narcía, respectively. Moreover, I have two reasonably fragile egos behind those two reviews, belonging to Don Mueang Changi and Dr. Francis Narcía, respectively. While it seems reasonably obvious that the reasonable thing to do is to choose the better review to publish, that turns out to be unreasonably difficult. There are honoraria to be paid, union rules to be heeded, interns to be flogged, bottom-line annualized growth forecasts to be met... so many reasonable considerations that, taken together, render any choice ultimately unreasonable.
Instead, I will say that neither of these reviews yet deserves—or will likely ever deserve—the label “classic,” nor “tour de force,” though either or both may yet be consigned unceremoniously to the proverbial dustbin of linguistics.
While neither is wholly inadequate, neither is either a truly elegant alternative to the other. Both contain Noun Phrases that make me Happy, and Noun Phrases that make me Unhappy. Yet both were accepted by an ambitious and forward-thinking journal. What are the odds?
And what are the odds I’ll have to resign my commission as Deputy Sub-Assistant Editorial Review Editor Reviewer after this debacle? Can phonology answer that, Mssr. Pulju? Je pense que non!
