Disclaimer
	Introduction—Tom Ernst & Evan Smith
How Much is that Dogma in the Window?
	The Abstract Abstract—Edith Maxwell
	On Being Further Tempted From Go to Went—Bernard Comrie
	Spore Theory: A Contribution to the Study of the Biological Foundations of Natural Language—David Athletesfoot
	A Taxonomy of Argument Schemata in Metatheoretical Discussion of Syntax or Name That Tune—G.R.A.M.M.A.R.
	A New Basic Word Order: VOV—Arnold P. Fasnacht
	On Being Polite to Women in Slavic Languages—Émil Schouwiniste-Pigge
Quote While You’re Ahead
	Great Moments in Linguistic History
	Lesser-Known Quotes on Meaning—Th. R. Hofmann
	T-Shirt Logos—Peggy McCardle and Ruth Armentrout
	Pseudo-Dictionary of Pseudo-Linguistic Pseudo-Terminology—D*LF*N
Going Around in Linguistic Circles
	“Language” Characteristics in Certain Higher Primates (Professors of Education)—Charles Bishop
	You’ll Be A Master Polyglot Once You’ve Signed Up To Be A Member Of The Language-Of-The-Month Club—Bruno Dončikov
	O Science Method—Metalleus
	Expansions of Murphy’s Law for Linguists (mostly)—Metalleus
	(Untitled)—James D. McCawley
	A Neurolinguistic Analysis of Sex and Second Language Learning: A Note—Loraine Obler
	The Great Yale Autodescriptives List—Michael A. Covington
Scene-Arias, or All the World’s a Stage
	As the Word Turns—Tom Ernst and Evan Smith
	My Fair Linguist, or Male-Pygion—Tom Ernst and Evan Smith
How Time Flies When You’re Having Phones
	German in Indo-European—Namtrah Nevets
	Speech Errors as Evidence for Historical Generative Phonology—Joseph Paul Stemberger
	Reconstructing the Proto-Indo-Europeans—Joseph Paul Stemberger

	Speculative Grammarian / Lingua Pranca Archives